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Searching For Identity – Day 4.

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Searching For Identity- Day Two.

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Welcome to Day One guys!

I decided to start this 21 Day session based on the background theme of my new fantasy fiction novel THE PEBBLE – Discovery Is Only The Beginning’. (check it out if you fancy a read).

Day One

Life is not made of one single event, no one definable act shapes your destiny and purpose, no one triumph or tragedy of your past makes your tomorrows. Rather a tangled thread of genetics, other peoples choices, and perhaps your own, sent you into a unsure existence today. Stop trying to build a picture with the jigsaw pieces of the past, you may find that the image you end up with is not reality at all!

Ecclesiastes 1:9 (it is a book in the bible, honest) tells us that

What has been will be again,

what has been done will be done again;

there is nothing new under the sun

This however was written when the author felt sorry for himself, there IS a new thing today under heaven….YOU! So, take a deep breath and start the steps to discovery of what you are not and maybe what you really are!

Until tomorrow,

Be Real!

 

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Right from the bat, straight off that is, let me throw down the division line. I am a Christian speaker ( the word minister is linked to Government in this part of the world and a dangerous link in a recession!!) who is pro life, that is I want ALL to see the fullness of themselves come into the world and impact others. I am a proper Christian, as you can see I have a beard and everything….

What I want to write about is a little piece called WHY ME?.

When I was just a newly wed, 23 years old and with a wife just gone 21 years old, we sat in a labour ward in the local hospital in Drogheda, Ireland. In the midst of the chaos, the roaring, the goo (I likened it to a scene from Black Hawk Down but let’s move on) my sweat covered wife looked at me with those two pools of pale blue eyes and begged me to answer a question as another push was needed…”Why me, what am I doing here?”.

Now my answer was simple, logical and totally male painted in a colour of black and white “Because you have to be, and you have no choice but to go through with it now. it’s circumstances!” and on my wife pushed to the birth of our first child, a cool kid called Jamie. As our country here, Ireland, is freeing itself from decades of slavery to religion, after decades of near slavery to a foreign power, people are unsure what to do with that freedom especially now the Celtic Tiger has caught a cold and died, and at the moment we are caught in the midst of a debate on legal abortion and churches are gearing themselves to form a response to Govt and trying to influence the law makers to ensure the church standard is imposed on the nation.

This current hot topic got me praying and thinking the other day as I walked and I heard the cry once more of “Why me?” in the whisper of my spirit and I began to think of those who lie in an abortion clinic, alone sometimes and scared, asking the questions to the air, “Why me?”

The answer is not what we have often wrongly tarnished at these girls of ‘Because you are loose or a sinner’ or whatever judge and jury scripture was thrown at them. The answers is the same as the answer I gave my beloved wife…..circumstances.

We, the church, have failed the girl who in the midst of circumstances made a choice and we failed to listen to her “WHY ME?” and were too eager to tell her how to live her life and not listen to the life she is living.

I believe, and I will ask Him someday, that when the woman caught in adultery was brought before Jesus, the crowd wanting to stone her, and Jesus wrote in the sand with his finger. I believe the words He would have written is M  I   N  E. The woman was His, she was in the midst of circumstances, the middle of her choices, surely thinking “WHY ME?” and when she spoke Jesus listened to the life she was living………..

We Christians can as easily stone people today with placards, demonstrations and inflammatory on line comments, but where are we thinking of a God writing the words MINE in the sand? Are we too worried about building laws and not tearing down circumstances to allow the “WHY ME?” girl to stand on the rubble of her circumstances and see the liberty of her potential………………

I do think the life on the unborn child is vital and should be protected, I often wondered have we aborted the child who was to go on and cure cancer, but I am as equally convinced the “WHY ME?” girl or woman is AS VITAL. How many times have we let her be stoned and not looked at her potential and see the writing of the King of the universe say about her  MINE!!!!!!!!

Till next time

Be Love and Be Loved!!

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Choose Your Counsel Well....

Many a battle has been won in the mind of great Generals. Although many have then been lost in the tents of his officers. Choose your company well, select the ear you divulge your plans and dreams to VERY CAREFULLY……..

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Where is Joshua? ~ A story with a question for us all…..

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“Oh, I don’t know Angie,” Rick muttered, slipping her arm off his shoulder with a serpent slick dodge. “I don’t even know the guy. Besides, weddings are a family thing. I will feel out of place.”

Grapping his hand, Angie persisted. “You will love it, and it will do you the power of good. So relax, you will get on great with everyone.” Flirtatious peck on the cheek, and a girlie melt smile later, Angie added. “And anyway, I want to show my catch off!”

Rick was weakening. Velvet lips have that effect on most guys, and these were lipstick coated and bearing whispers and a sure fire winner over Rick’s stubbornness. “Ok, I will meet you at the back of the church”, he replied, flicking his finger at the card twirling between Angie’s salon perfect nails. “You sure he won’t mind?”

Angie giggled, planted a smack on Rick’s lips and thrust the invitation, yellow card and calligraphy writing, into his face. “Sure your name is on the invitation, see!”

“My name?” Rick replied, grabbing at the card in Angie’s hand. So sudden she inspected any potential nail damage. Relieved at the lack of scuffed varnish, she blew air and then scowled at Rick. He gave her a sheepish look and continued. “Let me see. Pretty please.”

“Here, take it easy!”

Reading the card as he took it from Angie, Rick gave an impression of licking his lips with a slice of a grin, mumbling. “So it does, how strange. Hey, the church name is smudged though. Where is it?”

Angie had skipped off ahead of Rick, her floral dress twirling as she looped around dandelions and daisies on the ground, calling back. “Yeah, the name is not so important! 7pm!” Then stalling, tipping her nail on her lip and smirking, added. “Anyway, you won’t miss it. It will be the one with the wedding and loads of people at it. I will be at the back of the church. See you then!”

And that was that, Rick was going and two days later he stood outside a towering grey-bricked building, all suited and booted and then…froze. The noise was deafening and to someone from his family background, unmistakeable.

*****

Through the waves of feathered heads and groomed crew cuts, Rick spotted Angie, and signalled he was heading outside. Quickly she parted the hustle of a crowd and emerged in the tarmac courtyard.

“Why did you leave?” Angie asked, tearing at Rick’s sleeve, twirling him around. “What’s up?”

“Seriously, are you kidding?” Rick replied, rolling his arm toward the bursting at the seams church. “Did you see them; they are tearing each other apart.  Comments so cutting, never mind the shoving for position.”

Dismissive and snorting a forced laugh, Angie grabbed Rick’s clammy temples and looked into his eyes. “Is that all? Honey, we are family, we always fight!”

“Well if you do that to family, what would you do to me, a stranger?” Rick answered, stabbing himself in the chest with Angie’s hand that had wrapped around his fingers as he pulled her from her soft vice grip of his forehead. “I think I will pass!”

“Suit yourself!” Angie stomped and screamed in sync. “Your problem is you can’t just accept things you can’t change. You can’t handle order and authority!”

His jacket tails flapping in the wind, Rick twirled and laughed. “That’s order and authority?” then adding, “if so, keep it!”

Rhyming off an impressive gathering of expletives and accusations Rick stormed down the High St, lost in his annoyance for even showing up, he should have known better. Then suddenly, the calling of his name behind him took him out of his internal rant.

“Rick, hold on!”

“Sorry” Rick replied as he turned around to see a breathless, red-faced guy, clobbered in a pin stripe morning suit chasing after him.

“Man, you walk fast, I kept calling but I could hardly catch up or get your attention. Where are you heading?

“I don’t know, why?” Rick snapped. “And you are?” His abrupt manner made him blush, so Rick adjusted his question. “Sorry, I mean I didn’t get your name.”

“That’s’ cool. I am Joshua, the groom from the wedding. You mind if I tag along to wherever…?”

“No, but should you not be back at the wedding?”

“Them?” Joshua answered, wrapping an arm around Rick’s shoulder. “They won’t even know I am gone! So where we off to?”

Shaking his head, Rick answered. “To my mate’s place. He runs a restaurant in town, Masks, you know it?”

“Heard of it, yeah” Joshua said. “Sounds good to me.”

“Ok then” Rick replied, throwing a curious glance at his companion. “Strange you left your own wedding though man, I mean Joshua.”

Silence in reply, just a look that would cut glass.

“Well, I have to warn you there is no bar. They ran out of stock, so just juice and water I am afraid.” Rick warned through a choked laugh.

“Really?” Joshua asked as his voice pitched excited. “It is years since I done this, but come on..”

“Done what?”

Joshua raced ahead, jumping and twirling like a kid at a sweetshop and overdosed on sugar. “I have something to show you….just water you say?”

“Yeah”

Tugging on his mouse thin goatee, Joshua whispered into Rick’s ear as he headed straight toward the door of Masks. “Interesting.”

*****

Hours must have passed, in what seemed like minutes. Everyone laughing, drinks and chat flowing, and the crowd circling the suited, and looking completely out of place, stranger.

From the corner of the room, Rick saw Joshua was getting ear bashed by Vicky. Two abortions and three failed marriages had turned her into the party nightmare; the amateur psychologist had even learned, the hard way, to avoid her. Rick watched as Joshua did not get to release one word, not one in the five minutes or more he watched him.

“Joshua!” Rick called out, beckoning him over. “Sorry about that” he apologised, as Joshua came over.

Oh Vicky,” Joshua replied. “She is fine.”

Rick laughed. “You never got a word in!”

“Never needed to Rick,” Joshua added, heading off to get some air. “I’m about answers, not circumstance. She knew what she wanted; she did not need me to tell her!”

Joshua was gone only ten minutes tops, when Rick came looking for him. Finding him sitting on his mobile phone out in the terrace.

“You coming back inside?” Rick asked, tipping Joshua on the shoulder. “Everyone is asking about you.”

Waving a finger in the air, Joshua finished his phone call and put away his mobile. “Sorry, it was my dad!”

“Bet he is looking for you at the wedding party, huh?”

Joshua laughed a tickle of a laugh, a chuckle with a hint of pain. “No, they are in full flow. Smoked salmon, silver service and best china, not to mention the best music. They don’t even know I’m gone!”

“But Angie, she invited me. I feel terrible and…..”

Joshua touched his finger on Rick’s lips, a masculine push to silence his words. “I invited you, wrote the invite. Angie just delivered it. There is a huge difference. And besides,” pausing and pulling Rick’s mobile phone out of Rick’s hand as he lit his cigarette. “I am sure you have some more friends on this you can ask down here. I can conjure up a feast out of nearly nothing, you know. Just give them a call!”

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